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letra de layabouts - vera johnson

i would like to emigrate to some place far away
malawi, tanzania or california
australia or canada, new zealand might be good
i’d even move to some place like new guinea if i could
i scan the ads each day to see what talents i can sell
but no one has an opening for a useless ne’er-do-well

away out in uganda they want civil engineers
and i’ve practised being civil off and on for several years
in fiji they need typists and a systems -n-lyst
but in my education these are two things that were missed
i might be a staff surveyor, if i know what that entailed
but what humiliation if i tried it and i failed

why don’t they advertise for layabouts – layabouts
every country ought to have a few – have a few
we just sit around all day, in an un0btrusive way
and you must admit we’re quite a pleasant crew – a pleasant crew
now chemists, they make poisons and physicists make bombs
and engineers drive roads through every farm
but the highly sk!lled and qualified and practised british layabout
he never does a bl–dy bit of harm
as marketing executive, i think i could excel
for i’m used to doing shopping and i know the market well
when they call for senior draughtsmen, i might be the one they chose
for i’m pretty sharp at draughts and better still at dominoes
but something makes me hesitate and holds me back, you see
i’m waiting for that special ad that’s really meant for me

- vera johnson

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