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letra de empty lot in new orleans, pt. 2 - sonny falls

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it was an empty lot in new orleans
where the girl i loved was k!lled
was that the doing of some sick god?
some destiny fulfilled

i’d rather think that it’s all chaos
spinning in the void
rather than being a marionette
that’ll never have a choice

strings attached at birth
eternal umbilical cord
shamed and stuffed like a toy
to fear for rewards

i wanna believe that there’s reason
otherwise i’m terrified
incessant, intrusive thoughts
constantly invade my mind

every single awful thing i’ve seen
playing all at once
’til the cacophony climaxes
like one thousand car crashes

and the tires squeal
and the windshield shatters
and the silence is full and fills me like a meal
so i can try to centralize my energy
and try to make some sense

try and find a focal point
and attempt to aim the lens
that’s in my brain fixed in place
good or bad behind my face

sometimes i wish i had a god
so that i could believe in fate
but that’s a hole that isn’t filled
you can’t will it into being

well, that’s a hard to swallow pill
but i think that’s why you don’t talk to me
i’m godless in the wild
my mom’s forgotten child

set aside by accident
maybe later reconciled
but the future is a specter
on the outskirts of the city

and she’s chain smoking in a car
and waiting patiently
for her time to come
and inevitably it does
i think if you listen closely
you can hear that engine humming

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