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letra de unproductive life plan - ぐちり (guchiry)

(note: i don’t know j-panese, i used deepl to translate this so it may not all be correct)

omniscient, omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, omnipresent, omniscient, omnipresent
i can’t write down all the questions i want to ask you
what in the world is life? what in the world is love?
who am i? i don’t even know what i don’t know

standing there, unable to face the far wall of reality
i don’t think there’s anything wrong with that, in fact, i don’t think there’s anything wrong with it
if you have time to lecture others, if you have time to spare for others
if you have time to lecture others, then go ahead and do it
was this life worth it?

i’ve clung to something that has no reason to live
i ate and ate and ate to prolong my life
we’re the ones living now, piling ego on top of ego
we could never find a reason to love
we’ve lived fruitless lives, as if we’d never loved
i’m done with this unproductive life plan

god’s power to create all things that are, and all that will be, in the world
why did you create such a useless life?
that one who was drunk on self-sacrifice, that one who fed on others’ misfortune…
she who deceives with deception and sophistry, she who k!lls with impunity

as i spent my days sleeping with an ideal in a dreamscape, i realized
everything in the universe, everything that exists, everything that exists, everything is rotten
the idea of idolatry, the brain of the girl i loved
my own nature, my own guts, everything… i can’t help it, there’s nothing i can do to save it

i wasn’t happy enough to say, “i don’t have a reason to live.”
i couldn’t treat it so poorly that i’d spit out, “that’s all there is.”
i was the one who wanted to live even though i was saying i didn’t need it
i wanted to love so much that i didn’t need a reason to love
i’ve lived a life so empty that i couldn’t even love myself
i just want it to end
i’ve been clinging to something that doesn’t exist as a reason to live
i ate and ate and ate and ate and ate and ate and ate and ate
we’re living now on top of ego piled on ego piled on ego
we could never find a reason to love
i’ve lived a fruitless life that i’ve never loved
let’s put an end to it, with our own hands, no one else’s
i’ll make it up as i go along

a life plan with no end in sight

- ぐちり guchiry

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