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letra de coping methods - foreboder

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they told me time would heal
and this hurt would fade
but this pain i feel
won’t go away
i want to be my old self
just for a while
maybe then i could manage
to fake a f-cking smile

so i kick and scream
i push and shove
because i know
your ego outgrew my love
and i still can’t bear
to see your face
because the one who wore it once
has been replaced

your putrid scent still lingers here
this place reeks of regret and fear
a shrine to the callous, to the obtuse
a testament to your abuse

do i hate myself?
or do i hate you?
or is this some kind of f-cked up feeling
that’s outgrown me too?

i miss those days
when i could hold you close
and my rage-fuelled fits
were just th-rns on a rose
a small dent in me
but i was still whole
a complete human being
until you left me cold
in the black of night
i’d be lying awake
then a blinding light
and the bed would vibrate
so i’d open my eyes
and i’d check the phone
i’d see your name and smile
because i knew i wasn’t alone

but those days are dead
dead as can be
dead as i am inside
dead as you are to me

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