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letra de shiv - eric benoit

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she didn’t mean me harm
in the restaurant surrounded by all of our friends
“on a scale of 1 to 10,” she asked him
“how g-y are you?”

with one being tim, a living rainbow
and 10 being eric benoit, ramrod straight
i froze
my breath stopped
body hardened

stammering, “that’s not true”
an unceremonious departure later
i was crying in my room

goodbye to falsehoods
goodbye to comfort
i don’t have to be invisible
goodbye to loving easily
a short-lived respite from my invisibility

of course now, i prefer the dark
nothing ever really changes
love will always elude me
i’ll learn to love myself one day
do you believe me?
ever the bold one
i sent an email
and it read
“there is a fire inside of me
it’s small, but it’s bright
and it lives alongside
all the women i’ve loved in my life”

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