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letra de iudicium per ignem - dead/awake

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separated by the astral plane
i descend into eternal flame
demonic deities beckoning my name
my skin begins to boil
as hands reach from the soil
grabbing pulling dragging scratching pulling me into the darkness
can’t get free my senses are failing me
i can’t breathe i’m fighting and panicking struggling
suffocating
corpses surrounding me following swallowing
feeding
eating all of my flesh and bone
screaming knowing that i am here alone
fade to black and now only my soul remains
i awaken in an unknown realm
just a vehicle while i’m at the helm
prisoner of this reoccurring nightmare
pushing forth i know salvations waiting right there
disoriented but i know that i’ve been here before
my instincts taking hold and begging me to search for me
voices begging me to learn from all this suffering
what is the message that they’ve tasked me with uncovering

a new fire ignites inside me
i fight off the demons beside me
unbeknownst to the ways i should turn
crawling through the corpses as adrenaline burns
see a fl!ckering light in the distance
hoping it will reward my persistence
see a doorway turn the handle
to a room that’s lit with candles

i look around confusion clouding as i settle in
i feel a rumble in my feet beneath the sediment
a creature rises from the floor a living breathing callous
frozen in fear but it appears that it means me no malice

it speaks an unknown language in an old familiar voice
it drops a blade down at my feet and offers me a choice
“put the blade inside your chest to start your life anew
strike me down and all your suffering continues”
hold the blade and contemplate my actions
i know my choice – antic-p-tion makes me nauseous
i raise the weapon knowing that this is a test of faith
a sacrifice of life required by the unknown wraith
i take a breath and slowly slide the blade into my breast
fight through the pain in hopes this finally puts me to rest
the creature nods in satisfaction grinning ear to ear
the test is passed it says and you are free to leave from here

a light appears shining showing me the exit
my room appears my body laying where i left it
i close my eyes and realize the reason for my journey
i am learning
i know not yet my life’s purpose but the message is
a greater person lies before me on the precipice
with greatness now inside my reach i venture to my vessel
i awaken freely
i can now begin my healing

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