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letra de ode to minions - bitfinity (matthew taranto)

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[bowser]
do you remember the piranha plant you roasted in 5-1?
and were you there when his family received the news about their son?
these minions clock in from 9 to 5 to provide for their wives…
not knowing it’d be the last day of their lives!

so light a candle for the goombas that were crushed beneath your feet
say a prayer for all the octoroks that were sliced into mince meat
give a shout out to the keese you k!lled just to open that locked door
’cause no one thinks about the minions anymore…

(spoken)
[moblin]
as we gather here to mourn the loss of our pal, let’s never forget that dodongo disliked smoke. he disliked smoke… to the end!

[starman]
goodnight, sweet kraken

[new-age retro hippy]
it’s pr-nounced “crackin’…”

[wolf]
i will give him this: he used bombs wisely, but at what cost? at what cost!?

[narrator]
the last metroid is in captivity. the rest… have all died

[koopa]
curse you, spiny blue sh-ll!

(sung)
[bowser]
your pet yoshi helped himself to a buffet…
(shy guy flambe)
you’ve slain ’em just for being in your way…
(“get ’em, entei!”)

they’ve got kids to feed, yards to weed, taxes and bills to pay…
so put your plumber’s hat over your heart and say…

that you’re sorry to the mets you fried just to grab an extra screw!
apologize to the ducks you shot so a dog wouldn’t laugh at you!
genocide is typically frowned upon, and yet samus disagrees
don’t forget the imps you k!lled for exp…

these minions gave their lives…
for guys like…
me…

- bitfinity matthew taranto

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