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letra de things we didn’t say (interlude) - zimkitha

i feel like we have not been the same since that thing happened
even when we attempt to talk about it, we talk over it
act like it hasn’t changed us
we’d rather talk over the pain, the loss
talk over the insecurity, the fear, the vulnerability because we really do not want to re-hash the fear we had
so many didn’t make it, so many still don’t make it
we were in mourning actually but we couldn’t takе the time to grievе
we couldn’t afford it, grief was expensive
we’re still in mourning by the way, while perpetuating a performative state of living and a perpetual state of anxiety
we are on that ‘flight, fight, freeze’ mode
convincing ourselves that there is no time to respond with love and say “ay man, sorry for your loss hey.”
yet we find all the time in the world to remind each other of our contractual obligations
we glorify self-deprivation, that that ‘thing’ that happened changed us guys
we were dehumanized by the levels of desparation, desensitized by the hustle, overfed by the ego
we are constantly gaging each other’s worth with the vague sense of self-worth
so many quotes, clap-backs about self-worth
so many brands and quotations for self-worth
ku vague, ku cloudy, kuningi
and lately, conversations with yourself are haunting because of that
but then the old version of you is rotting because of that
but today, we are going to take it in
today, we take it slow
we are on a quest to heal, exorcize, de-mistify our bodies, minds and presence in the world

- zimkitha

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