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letra de drone - woke up older

stay awake
i close my eyes, feel everything at once
fade to grey
you put your faith on needles end
the hemlock’s in your blood

i can start to make out imprints on the floor
from months of laying still
i feel like i’ve lost all that i fought for
getting out of bed each day still k!lls me
in the morning
all i think about is you
i made an army of angels in my carpet
guardians in my living room
i don’t know why i’m not letting this go
i spent these six months on my own
and i’ve got nothing to show for it
i don’t know why i’ve been feeling so low
and every day just seems to drone
on disappointments i can’t outgrow

and it feels like i haven’t slept in weeks
because each time i close my eyes
i drown silent in apathy
choke on every opportunity to be the man
that you need me to be
second chances, ghosts and memories
spending hours chasing shadows between the sheets
i still see you in the retina static too
you hung yourself with the slack i gave you

you found a temporary fix
for all your problems
but it turned into a permanent solution
now i’m dealing with the aftershock
that comes from time to time
i’m still wrestling these anxious thoughts
that haunt me in the night
i haven’t changed at all inside
i don’t know why i’m not letting this go
i spent these six months on my own
and i’ve got nothing to show for it
i don’t know why i’ve been feeling so low
and every day just seems to drone
on disappointments i can’t outgrow

i slowly watched your best years wash away
like a monterey sunrise
i shouldn’t be surprised it never came
you said that this was it and that you’d
change

- woke up older

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