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letra de in held (twas) in i - transatlantic

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i. glimpses of nirvana

in the darkness of the night, only occasionally relieved by glimpses of nirvana as seen through other people’s windows, wallowing in a mor-ss of self-despair made only more painful by the knowledge that all i am is of my own making …

when everything around me, even the kitchen ceiling, has collapsed and crumbled without warning. and i am left, standing alive and well, looking up and wondering why and wherefore

at a time like this, which exists maybe only for me, but is nonetheless real, if i can communicate, and in the telling and the bearing of my soul anything is gained, even though the words which i use are pretentious and make you cringe with embarr-ssment, let me remind you of the pilgrim who asked for an audience with the dalai lama

he was told he must first spend five years in contemplation. after the five years, he was ushered into the dalai lama’s presence, who said, ‘well, my son, what do you wish to know?’ so the pilgrim said, ‘i wish to know the meaning of life, father.’

so the dalai lama smiled and said, ‘well my son, life is like a beanstalk, isn’t it?’

held close by that which some despise
which some call fake, and others lies
they say i’m somewhat small
for one so weak, for one so tall
a doubting thomas who would be?
it’s written plain, written plain for all to see
for one who i am it’s all gone
it’s hard at times, when it’s all gone wrong

they say that jesus healed the sick and helped the poor
and those unsure believed his eyes
a strange disguise still write it down
it might be read
nothing’s better left unsaid

ii. in the autumn of my madness

in the autumn of my madness
when my hair is turning grey
for the milk has finally curdled
and i’ve nothing left to say
when all my thoughts are spoken
save my last departing breath
bring all my friends unto me
and i’ll strangle them with words

in the autumn of my madness
which in coming won’t be long
for the nights are now much darker
and the daylight’s not so strong
and the things that i believe in
are no longer quite enough
for the knowing is much harder
and the going’s getting rough

iii. look to your soul

i know if i’d been wiser
this would never have occurred
but i wallowed in my blindness
so it’s plain that i deserve
for the sin of self-indulgence
when the truth was writ quite clear
i must spend my life amongst the dead
who spend their lives in fear
of a death that they’re not sure of
of a life they can’t control
it’s all so simple really
if you just look to your soul

some say that i’m a wise man
some think that i’m a fool
but it doesn’t matter either way:
i’ll be a wise man’s fool
for the lesson lies in learning
and by teaching i’ll be taught
for there’s nothing hidden anywhere
it’s all there to be sought
and so if you learn anything
look closely at the time
but others will remain untrue
and won’t commit that crime

iv. grand finale

[instrumental]

- transatlantic

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