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letra de yuletide bars - the variety pack

[intro: all]
it’s your boys, the variety pack, up in here
we got the oatmeal
(right!)
and the rice cookerrrrr
(rice!)
and your boyyy
(tell em!)
the nutcracker, yeah, ahem
yuh! huh!

[verse 1: the nutcracka]
it’s cold outside, so come on in
the snow is white, just like my skin (skin!)
it’s warm in here, come sit by the fire
put on a scarf, girl, don’t be cold (that’s hot!)
you see that fire? you know it’s hot
just like this tall gl-ss of egg nog i just brought (ayyy, rice)
pour it down your throat, you know it’s good
come on girl, tell me, are we in this hood? (woo!)

-recorder-

[verse 2: the oatmeal]
yuh
it’s ya boy, the oatmeal, he thick as h-ll
got it so swell, gonna eat the turkey as well
chicken, with that stuffin’ (stuffin!)
got vegetables, now i’m onto the dessert (yo!)
gingerbread, all these houses, stompin on them like a gorilla
(make that gingerbread gluten-free, please)
ooh!
vegetables, pie with that fruitcake, uh!
call me santa cause i be stealin milk and cookies
and i got a fat sack to fill with goods (sack! yum!)
all up in this hood, uh!
rice cookies, turkey chicken
eatin up, already on my fourth plate!
my cousins be lookin skinny as h-ll
but i’m sittin here thick, that’s perfectly swell
speakin bout food, here’s your boy
he’s about to fill em with the toys, go!

[verse 3: the rice cooka]
open up the presents with the squad
all come together like peas in a pod (yeah!)
got some karaoke up in this room
let’s sing by the fire!
someone get the broom! (yeah!) (uh!)
you want some rice? i got it in stock
just gather round and suck my-
-slide whistle-
(yuh/yeah!)

[outro: all]
woo!
variety pack!
2019! 2019! we love you guys! (yeah!)
we’ll see ya! see ya then! see you then!
woo! yeet, yeah!
…
i p-ssed my pants. (same.)

- the variety pack

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