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letra de hospital / h / the social worker dragon - suffocate for fuck sake

now we’re at the hospital. hasse is lying on an examining table, waiting. a poster is hanging on the wall, showing the structure of the spine

– you’ve got nothing to lose on there being a plan to improve the back
– what they can do is get you to visit one of these pain clinics. the question is whether or not it’s worth it, just to be able to move a few hundred meters further without pain
– but let’s say you could go down to hallstahammar with less of a hassle
– yes, but what i’m asking is whether or not its worth it just to bе able to walk a few hundred mеters further
– but is it really meant to be that way. that you, for example, shouldn’t be able to sit?
– well, that’s something you can work up to. i’m going to have to, either that or, for example, use the toilet while halfway standing and halfway sitting. and that’s enough, why should i need to sit? in order to aimlessly ride around on a bus?
– are there no other situations where you feel it would be beneficial to be able to sit?
– no, i can’t think of any. sit on a bench outside while feeding pigeons?
– sit in your kitchen?
– well, in that case i might as well be standing. i don’t understand the difference between standing and sitting, it’s not that important to sit
– but i’m having a hard time understanding what’s being said. there’s a freedom in increased mobility
– yes, but there’s also a freedom in not experiencing any pain

the greatest change in hasse’s life is that he is no longer able to sit because he has gone through arthrodesis due to vertebral misalignment of the spine. he’s able to stand up and walk for short periods without support, but is constantly suffering from pain. he spends most of his days lying down

– but are you receiving sickness benefits for the rest of your life?
– yes, it seems like it
– it seems like it? do they have any plans for getting you rehabilitated?
– no, i’ve often asked about it. but it seems like there’s nothing they can do. and, in a way, that sounds tragic, but i can’t think of anything that would alleviate these kinds of things. perhaps some specialized training that makes it possible to sit. but should you sit when it only leads to pain?

(hasse is listening to an old interview featuring him)
– it’s like a dragon that i have to fight against. it’s the social thing. social district 13
– dragon?
– i have to fight it with my sword, while it breathes fire towards me. but i’m going to win. and everyone knows that the knight always wins and gets the princess in the form of a check, a cash check
– i have to stop here. did i really say that?
– yes, you did

- suffocate for fuck sake

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