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letra de tough motherfucker (with an eyepatch) - sean altman

once upon a time in the land of canaan
hebrews roamed the land
frol!cking, unfettered, unbettered by the goyim
building shuls out of sand

[child]
and then what happened, popsie?

life was free and simple, til some scamps trampled our temple
and slandered our hebraic brand
thus began a cycle every knowledgable kike’ll tell you
sp-wned a great cyclopian man

a man named moshe dayan…

he was a tough! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
he was a tough! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
he was a tough! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
he was a tough motherf-cker (with an eyepatch!)

times were tough! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
they played rough! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
he said enough is enough! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
he was a tough motherf-cker (with an eyepatch!)

not since the pirates of the caribbean had an eyepatch stirred such fright
not since yul brynner in the king and i had a bald head shown such light
he had a stash of uranium and an egg-white cranium with a round matzo-ball perfection
like if moses and mr. clean had a lovechild with limited depth perception
he was a tough! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
he was a tough! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
he was a tough! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
he was a tough motherf-cker (with an eyepatch!)

he liked m-ff! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
slept in the buff! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
didn’t take no guff! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
he was a tough motherf-cker (with an eyepatch!)

a teenage freedom fighter’s fate (to kick b-tt!)
for the right to a jewish state
denizens of antisemitic hate
got blinded by the glare off his glimmering pate

everybody sing! what do we need? (we need a tough motherf-cker)
i said what do we need (we need a tough motherf-cker)
come on, what do we need (we need a tough motherf-cker)
another tough motherf-cker with an eyepatch

moshiach ain’t nowhere to be found
sammy davis jr’s gone underground
ron jeremy’s otherwise occupied
and jesus switched to the other side

well some brave jew’s gotta pick up the slack
we done lost our mojo, gotta get it back
well maybe i’m that perfect guy
i’m gonna shave my head, poke out my eye…
i’ll be a tough! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
i’ll be a tough! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
i’ll be a tough! (motherf-cker with an eyepatch)
i’ll be the toughest motherf-cker! (with an eyepatch)

i’ll be the toughest motherf-cker with an eyepatch!
i’ll be the toughest motherf-cker with an eyepatch!
i’ll be the toughest motherf-cker with an eyepatch!
i’ll be a tough motherf-cker (with an eyepatch!)

yeah…

- sean altman

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