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letra de twenty nineteen girl - polyana (usa)

i crumble under pressure, trying so hard to breathe
no, it’s not easy to believe that i had woken up from this dream
before i felt a crash, or i felt a sting
no, i don’t even feel a thing
last night, i couldn’t sleep, scared ’bout the journey ahead of me
so i called my closest friend and they said “don’t worry ’bout a thing”
because it’s easy to overthink
all you need to do is believe in nothing

she said her name to me softly, ‘fore she had left
she pushеd me from the mirror, told me “bunny, you’rе on your own now”
didn’t give me a chance to say goodbye to you
i think you already knew what i would try to do
you always knew me better than i knew myself, but lately
i’m standing on my own two feet, babe, i lived through it
i know i’ll struggle but it’s better than staying the same
i’ll fill that hole in your place

(you are still afraid, aren’t you?)
(if you want real happiness, you’ve got to find it for yourself!)

this time, maybe i’ll try again
remembering the gifts that you had left, they read my name
should have seen my face when i saw the way that things have changed
i wish that i could give you thanks just one more time
i see your energy in everything i do, i wonder if i’ve made you proud
if i talked to you right now? you would tell me that there’s something left
i know what it is, but i’m too afraid to say
the answer begins with your nickname
is it okay to say it’s over? things have changed
it’s not yet done, despite it all, i looked right towards your way
and cling on to the hope that one day i can say
uh, i’m not your twenty nineteen girl
you can’t fool me anymore
i don’t need you to tell me things i know because you’re bored

i’m not your twenty nineteen girl
if you don’t need me anymore
run away, i’ll go my own, goodbye
i’m thankful for your guidance, but
i’m not your twenty nineteen girl
i don’t want your praise anymore
i hope you’ll love the way sh-t’s going
’cause i’m hoping that in time i’ll show you

late night, on the phone with ellie
the most inspired that we’d ever been for days, on the mic, losing my age
i wonder, if my inner child saw me today
would she feel secure in knowing it’s okay? at one point i cared, but
i can’t help when the future’s promised to me
its too hopeful to be holy
why do i want to impress you? when i no longer even see you
my energy feels different this time, this last time i visited you
it’s the skate park, cul-de-sac, coca cola drink
it’s that bean bag, your bedroom, playing wii games
it’s the world that i can’t go back to everyday
when i come back, it’s so wrong, was i too late?
do i knock on your door? do i even say your name?
will you tell me that it’s over? will you tell me ‘go away’?
i don’t want to go back, i’ve got a better family
but if you ended up answering, i’d always end up saying i’m
i’m not your twenty nineteen girl
if you don’t need me anymore
run away, i’ll go my own, goodbye
i’m thankful for your guidance, but
i’m not your twenty nineteen girl
i don’t want your praise anymore
i hope you’ll love the way sh-t’s going
’cause i’m hoping that in time i’ll show you

leanne
goodbye
goodbye
goodbye
goodbye

it’s your creature
it’s my creature?
now it’s your creature
it’s mine now?
yeah!
like, on god?

- polyana usa

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