a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 #

letra de fruitcake commentary - larry the cable guy

Loading...

what the h-ll is this? russia?

what kind of moron would still give a fruitcake for christmas? good lord, you can’t eat the d-mn things. good lord, an ethiopian would look at a fruitcake and say, ‘ugh, gross! i’m going back to eating bugs and monkey brains.’ fruitcakes

tell you what, when i was a kid, we had to put two of ’em underneath the right-front wheel of the trailer to keep the living room sitting level

a lot of people don’t know, but did you know this? the fruitcake was also the main weapon used by texicans in the alamo? a lot of people don’t know that

fruitcakes first come to this country by a feller named jedediah herrington. he used ’em as fruit l!cks for his horses. a neighbor did him wrong one day, so to get even he sent him a fruit l!ck

throughout the years, the fruitcake has been used as a last-minute gift or as a ‘you’re-kind-of-a-b-tthole’ gift. the ancient romans used to stone folks with fruitcakes and the fruitcake was used in the first steam engines as coal substitutes
-burp- sorry, that was fruitcake

the fruitcake still today is being used by african pygmies to lengthen their wieners. it’s true, now! you listen! they tie the fruitcake to their ding-dongs and stretch it so that they look good for the annual march through town for hunting season. that’s true! for years, h0m-s used the same technique to get ready for g-y parades, until they stopped when the pineapple started causing rashes

so the story of the fruitcake is a good one. so if you get one for christmas, it’s either: 1. ’cause somebody’s mad at you, 2. you’re a b-tthole, or 3. you’re queer and you need to stretch your wiener

merry christmas! like bill clinton said to hillary after he got a fruitcake, quote, ‘i’ll be gone for an hour, stretching his wiener’, unquote

- larry the cable guy

letras aleatórias

MAIS ACESSADOS

Loading...