letra de dumbfoundead vs. rone - king of the dot
[round 1: rone]
i got this scouting report on dumb’ and i can make it go left
no sweat
i’ll turn this sh-t into a game of thrones set
bro test, we gon’ bet, i’m takin’ his whole check
funny how i’m three bars in and i still haven’t cracked an asian joke yet
i’m the greatest of all time
most creative of all time
check the history, i cross “t’s” and dot the small “i’s” (eyes)
no racist sh-t, those narrow views are not mine
like a north korean nuke boy, that sh-t will not fly
his real name is john park
and you were off to a hot start
but then you named yourself “dumb” that makes me think you’re…not smart
you listen to his music you think his vibe was all dark
but he’s got the personality of a greeter at wal-mart
well it’s goin’ down
like a bell of danger in an elevator
f-ck, an intercom in a generator
i’ll put the yellow ranger on a ventilator
the original king
i’m cedric the entertainer with the pen and paper
i’ll educate your casuals, i’m john madden through the telestrator
you’re a pencil pusher with a calculator
a now n later to an alligator
i’m a hall of famer, b-tch you watch the lakers
if i need a favor then i call the lakers
(or the bulls. or the bulls)
in my last battle i wore dions, within a year i was bros with him
i name dropped pat bev’, within two i had a show with him
manifesting, i got the future in my hands and i’m moldin’ it
if i had name dropped jesus christ he probably would’ve rose again
i’m at the podium, barkin’ like a doberman
some kung-fu put bong joon-ho through the linoleum
you had three anderson.paak beats and you still couldn’t blow with ’em
now he’s an msg and this p-ssy is throwin’ sodium
well i hear all the trap from these seedy suckers
but i pretend i don’t see it like i’m stevie wonder
we’re opposites, there’s no way we could see each other
you’re asian…b-tch i’m gettin’ even younger
but growin’ up i bet there’s painful memories you can’t jog
like goin’ to the rub and tug to get a hand job and it’s your grandma
and that’s a h-ll of a quandary when you have your d-ck out
do you dismount?
do you ask for the family discount?
you’re not descended from kublai khan, you’re a waiter at buddakan
so pay attention who’s louie vuitton’s you’ve been spillin’ those noodles on
it’s the rap game’s siroc, the way that i paint with dots
find me dumpin’ a machine gun like megan fox
we could box
find him slumped down in that vacant lot
you can’t tell if he’s slumped out or if he’s doin’ the asian squat
on twitter, november 9th, 2018
you said, “if i ever go broke i’ll hop back in that ring.”
well i’m glad that you’re here but i’m sorry you’re back
welcome home dumb’, let me know if you need to borrow some cash
[round 1: dumbfoundead]
you’re right, i had no part in anderson’s future
you hang with anderson cooper
by the way i’ve seen your wife, her body is smokin’
when i f-ck her you can watch, i’ll leave the door open
keep up with the references don’t get lost
i’ll f-ck the wedding ring off her, call her silk sonic the hedgehog
i said, the king has returned to the dot
korean jesus is home
all these lazy rappers usin’ asian accents, finally they leave me a rone (alone)
i came for pat stay tonight to celebrate his life
i know two wrongs don’t make a right but maybe k!llin’ one rone can make it right
you really thought you was pushin’ forward the whole culture
i work for myself, y’all work for old vultures
it’s funny how lush went to adam22 but you’re the one with no jumper
y’all chauffer’s, driving miss daisy’s with your boss in the backseat
i know that y’all can’t sleep knowin’ you exploit black rappers and athletes
but at bar stool you’re k!llin’ it bravo
but the only real ones from philly that i know are gilly and wallo
i bet you went to the office on the first day
like, “hey fellas. bang bang bird gang”
like you just learned slang
yeah get it through ya nerd brain, you’re lame
your only black friend is pat bev’
and on that show you won’t even let pat talk
how your roots in philly but you won’t even listen to a black thought
you must’ve lost your marbles or insane
give me the green light, i’ll slap the sh-t out of him, hit a l!ck on a cracker like squid game
i’ll call his bluff, like parasite sneak in his crazy rich parent’s house when they’ve gone to brunch
shang-chi ten rings, i’ll break everything, everywhere, all at once
i’m sick of ya tired puns
they’ve already been all done
there’s only so many ways you can be called “dumb”
but i don’t gotta use name flips to call you b-tch cause you already are one (r-one)
you’re an enormous geek
with ya old navy performance fleece
what is that? mormon chic?
i hate dorks that can’t play sports but wear official game shorts
but he chose to stand on the sidelines that was a good call
look y’all, the only dude to get injured in fantasy football
you wanna know how i know you’re a loser bro?
two words: super bowl
y’all lost to the chiefs, i know that sh-t jalen hurts
it was d-mn near reparations seeing the natives take it first
to make it worse, jalen’s ankle worked
this guy came to work with a philly championship tee cause he pre-made the shirt
you d-mn near lose to every patrick that ya know
so do us all a favor and take ya ass ma homes (mahomes)
[round 2: rone]
bro you have the tiniest…set of nostrils
i can’t tell if it’s cool if it’s lame
on one hand you stay duckin’ diseases, on the other you do love cocaine
and i’m not judgin’, it’s just the way his face was designed
but if you’re gonna share drugs, plan on takin’ your time
cause when everybody else is out breakin’ out lines, he gotta snort his cocaine one grain at a time
he breathes in it sounds like a long range missile
we breathes out it sounds like a f-ckin’ train whistle
they tried to rape this dude it would’ve been a terrible day
he just exhaled hard and it scared ’em away
f-ckin’ square ass head brother, who are you?
the offspring of lucy liu and rubik’s cube?
who is your uncle ahk?
a f-ckin’ funko pop?
my boy’s a lego best believe he runs a couple blocks
and i’m not even hatin’ bro i like that
lookin’ like a fine ass character from minecraft
but it’s gettin’ hard to tell what kind of accent he’s flexin’
you got a weird tw-ng like a cantonese texan
i’ll leave you cryin’ in h mart like j-panese breakfast
i got the smoke like fajitas in ya applebees section
i’ll split his dumpling once that .50 peel
baow! you just got yourself a disney deal
my bro’s mad? i’m poppin’ up in his b-tch, be real
she throw it back like a homer at wrigley field
i’ll give her 15 bucks and she’ll l!ck these nuts
your girl is a ho by name and your mom’s kim she (kimchi) sucks
dumb must be dump if he’s thinkin’ he’s at the top
you might think he’s fish scale, from how i see it it has to stop
you might think that he’s raw, from how i see it that sh-t’s chop
you might see dumb’ as a brick, i see dumb’ as a bag of rocks
and doom is imminent b-tch, you can see the shark tail
you try to drag race me, i’ll put your civic through a guardrail
dumb’s dumb as a hammer, you would buy at a yard sale
i’ll put this battle in a coffin and use dumb’ as a doornail
but wait, wait, wait
he said his ten year goal was to start in an action movie
that’s a doozie
you’re 5’6″ and a half with b00bies
the closest you ever get to an action movie is if they remake cars and you voice a hatchback suzuki
or in mickey mouse as a mandarin goofy
or in veggie tales as a sushi
let’s go through a checklist for an action hero
athleticism? that’s a zero
acting chops aren’t half dinero
s-x appeal is dan devito
stop it chino, the closest you ever get to an action hero is gettin’ frappuccino for al pacino
bro, and it’s not because you’re asian, they just don’t like suckin’
20 indie movies in and now you wanna try stuntin’?
indie 50, indie 60, you might realize something
you keep playin’ that race card you might hit indie (indy) 500
bro, on twitter, november 9th, 2018
you said, “if i ever go broke i’ll hop back in that ring.”
well i already gave you a $20 that’s just me bein’ decent
so pay me back when you get that action fl!ck, matter of fact, keep it
[round 2: dumbfoundead]
when we were yellin’ “black lives matter” tryin’ to stop asian hate
you were storming the capitol tryin’ to keep caucasian’s safe
in ferguson you thought the cops saved the day
with breonna taylor you would not say her name
you were mad as sh-t at kaepernick you little sports boy
you won’t take one knee for george floyd but i bet you take two for knees for david portnoy
i just know your mom’s a karen, they call her “ka-rone”
all on the phone, nagging tone
wouldn’t even let you rap alone unless she chaperones
she can’t condone any rapper with a blacker tone…than charron
you hated kanye, you wouldn’t even slap his songs until he appeared on alex jones
you’ve been a weirdo, i bet ya hero is ben shapiro
and he hate woke b-tches, i can’t make that up
nah, i mean like he hates woke b-tches like, he likes the ones that can’t get up off a date rape drug
i’m not sayin’ you’re a racist person
i’m just sayin’ that he dressed up as meek mill and got the make-up perfect
you know, trudeau
his favorite movie is rocky 3 but he won’t be caught dead watchin’ creed
but he’ll rewatch the scene where apollo dies in the boxing ring
it’s funny how when a black man got the lead he’s like, “mmmm. not for me.”
trippin’ about the little mermaid, imagine that scenario
a grown man mad about ariel
when they considered idris elba for james bond he was like, “god d-mn it. the whole thang’s wrong.”
bro that’s weird
you got so much black fear you won’t even watch black mirror
i asked him if he saw get out
he said, “nope”
the great white hope with a face like the pope
you see you’re not really helpin’ the people when you don’t see no one else as an equal
that’s why you’ll never get the ring, you’re a philadelphia smeagol
[round 3: rone]
as a “cis white male” i acknowledge that my existence is inherently racist
i’ve read the books, i’ve done the work and i can finally face it
and it’s not racist like i think one side has better genetics
but like, i don’t think you have a black fan that doesn’t have a tentacle fetish
now, is that wrong? yes, it’s bigoted and selfish
but since all white people are inherently racist, i guess i can’t help it
no, no, no, no, no
even though it’s been underground i still look like a f-ckin’ clown
and it’s been wrong, cause as the majority i was punching down
and i felt bad
was i part of this massive machine?
cutting off the culture before they could advance and succeed?
so i took chances to read, all the fantastic cuisine
all the history, i d-mn near traced it back to adam and g
and on the global scale, all the demographics are deep
6 out of 10 of all people come from back in the east
so if 3 out of 5 are asian that mathematically means
the real minority here is…actually me?
and i’m feeling marginalized
i need some acknowledgement
this feelings hard to describe
i might need a scholarship
this sh-t is tough to ignore
and not to run up the score
but since i’m not punching down then my asian jokes are f-cked up anymore
so you know what rhymes with “fu manchu”?
(what?!)
“wuhan flu”
all your faces look the same like the blue man group
i know covid f-cked up your diet, you can barely eat at all
cause when you heard it was made in a lab, you were thinking the breed of dog
you’ll turn a petsmart to a wet mart, so aggressively
and your cultural specialty was adding kimchi to the covid recipe
wait, i say that for a reason
in a movie called bad rap you gave battle rap a bad rap
right after it made you famous, it got stabbed in the d-mn back
you claimed the premise was racist, like you didn’t advance that?
like we’re not just roasting? someone get him a tampax
you’ve had mexican jokes, arab jokes, like that sh-t was usual
you versus an asian guy was like the stereotype super bowl
you told a black guy that they’d serve fried chicken at his funeral
and the worst part is, i thought that sh-t was beautiful!
but it’s his reasoning that puts my mind into a pretzel
he said, “tiger moms, good at math. all these stereotypes are stressful
they keep callin’ me a doctor. it’s a bit disrespectful
i might quit battle rap if they keep calling me…rich and successful.”
and it’s the most benign insult
they said, “rice eater. it’s the worst.”
oh, they said you eat the most popular food on earth?
see, every chopstick joke isn’t a hate crime
we’re different, that’s cool, it’s not a story for dateline
and that’s why i’m not concerned with playin’ dumb’ online
cause you never know when the man above calls “time!”
hey pat!
look what we did in your name
we miss you everyday bro, sh-t isn’t the same
i wish you were here to help us through this scariness
and cause soul khan is bi now it’s hilarious
bro, i wish i could just call you we could roast the sh-t for weeks
bi-ass jew doin’ circumcisions with his t–th
so until the day we can call him “g-y” together
we got your fam’, we’re hold your flame, pat stay forever
[round 3: dumbfoundead]
i went from booze bin to juice cleanse, i’m feelin’ like a new man
i know it makes you sick like i flew in from wuhan to get the w like a wu fan
no chance
i came outta an aa meeting ready to throw hands
and stomp ya with my sponsor, now that’s a 12 step program
for the last two weeks i fasted
i got the sober life mastered
close my eyes, frozen time, know the fly catch sh-t
it’s like bruce lee, flow like water, ocean tide
this is…beats me, season 4 or 5 of kobra kai
you see a few years ago i took him to la, i was his tour guide
and boy you never seen n0body more white
that sh-t felt like training day
it was denzel and the incel
he thought we was in the jungles, i was like, “bro. this is glendale.”
you know it don’t end well when we at the karaoke singin’ ‘thug mansion’ wearing oakley’s
you would’ve sworn we were at lollapalooza
he was bowing at everybody, homie, we are not the yakuza
i said, “f-ck it. let’s get some drugs.”
we did some bumps, he started mixing pixie dust in b-tches dixie cups
we needed a little pick me up
he literally had to pick her up, that sh-t was sus’
y’all really think i’ma get dissed by this b-tch?
who is this? mid-twist?
you’re 33 and had to pledge in a fraternity for eternity
before journalism, you were journaling
now you’re an anchorman; ron burgundy
i just wanna slap that snapback hat off bro
lookin’ like a wack backpack frat jack harlow
i know for the past few months you were on your computer like, “write me a battle rap chatgpt
ahhh. revise that. make it more like a frat smack dvd
good. now change it to the cadence of my favorite rapper
great. now give me a list of famous asian actors
neat
now take this bar and change it backwards
and put a bunch of bullsh-t in the middle same as dizaster
sweet.”
now ask it about me, my jersey hangs in the rafters
your status is questionable, maybe a.i. ain’t the answer
you see, matter of fact, i peeped your plan of attack
since you were on twitter telling everybody i was your fantasy match
bro, i don’t give a f-ck about you, i came back to battle for pat
that’s why i got pat on the front
you just wanted a pat on the back
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