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letra de kill yourself - john wesley (rap)

i can’t just write about you, i have to be in the right mood
and you aren’t even on my mind anymore, mind you
remember? i asked about our future and you said forget it
i did what you said but now you’re asking that i recollect it
my wife and children are all that i protect in essence
so i ^ couldn’t care less if you feel the need to protest the message
shh, don’t make a sound and be still
something about the american spirit that’s evil
i can’t put my finger on it but i don’t think i want to
my skeletons only come out to say “we’re coming to haunt you”
the paranoia turns me into a zombie
cause they don’t actually haunt me, it’s the thought of em doing it that’s haunting
so what if they come for me, i could use the company
plus i’m never too productive when i’m living comfortably
more churches that don’t hate, is something i would love to see
beliefs you’re born into can be difficult to unbelieve

today self glorification is a fashion statement
america’s not a country; it’s a procrastination
what kind of afterlife will you have after you p-ss away from
living, less you hate life and you’re standing at your casket waiting
is there more power in a pastor praying?
it seems like either you or someone you know is or was a cancer patient
the more you have the more pr-ne you are to aggravation
but hey, you couldn’t care less what a rapper’s saying
i haven’t been the same since my engagement
my faults and guilt look at me in amazement
what happened to the old you; there’ve been too many changes
a lack of faith has made me complacent

usually, you write regrets so you’re erasing the pages
writing makes the pages take my anger and erase it
not sure of jesus as a savior
but be thankful, creating the world doesn’t mean you’re obligated to save it
you know so little and only regulated in basics
heard of the impoverished but never felt the pain on their faces
donated one dollar once after feeling like you had to
you have more spiritual questions than i could ask you
i’m not about to dream failing to know that i’m awake
too many fail to dream and as result only get a wake
i don’t hate g-ys so take the record and set it straight
might as well be a family reunion so many can relate
i know, that was a poor use of imagination
it’s difficult when dark thoughts of death are the admiration
i love the thought of one day if we could banish hatred
and we already spoke of everyone being a cancer patient
so whether literally or part of an -n-logy
the only way you’re innocent cause of technicalities
unless of course you’re a calvinist
can’t help but not accept that god would be allowing this

life is surprises, usually aren’t gift wrapped
kids go off to college; parents learn that they’re mismatched
dad realizes his daughter doesn’t fit in his lap
and starts feeling bad when his kids ask about his past
you wake up and your kids are not in preschool
their actions start to say “we no longer need you”
could have been better parents, things we wish we could redo
we see the big picture, all this time was just a preview
millions sell their souls to retail
while billions sell their souls to buy retail, buying from every street sale
guys asking why, how many lies can she tell
i never thought i’d do this just so i could keep a female
kids sitting at their college desk, wondering why they gotta stress through the process
this degree seems like a lot of nonsense
the devil says – i never really wanted to turn to violence
but unfortunately you’re on the wrong side of my fence

it’s hot as h-ll, but i’m alive and well
and as for you i’ll sew your mouth shut and not k!ll you so you can survive to tell
i know i make a great name for myself don’t i
soon you’ll realize there’s not a tactic that i won’t try
see they want you to believe i exist in drug addicts
non-christians, hollywood movies and thug rappers
so they talk a big game, build churches and write hymns
unknowing that i’ve really manifested inside them
spend ten million dollars just to build another brick house
if they expand, they justify the finance with big crowds
but those who really need it aren’t allowed in or get kicked out
it’s like a hospital closing up to keep the sick out
i’ve mastered this plan, see they keep the offering
build more church and never really see the irony
every now and then they’ll donate a little bit
just so everyone feels like their charity’s legitimate

buying plasma screens, renovation, decorations
if no one calls ridiculous i guess i’d better say it
congregation getting high off the music that’s playing
never underestimate the slight of lucifer’s hand
and i don’t refer to the devil as a real person
it’s how i reference our internal selfish inertia
millions die daily of hunger and thirst
while our biggest concern is making sure that n0body curse

what’s even worse is they’re not thinking logically
they spend money to praise god but way less on getting rid of poverty
i have them in my grasp, just look at the time lapse
less fortunate die fast, and look where their mind’s at
paving new parking lots, hang the right art or not
in terms of hypocrisy, this mind frame’s hard to top
baptize in culligan, give everyone a bulletin
your prayer means nothing, your hands, you’re not folding them

never seen a war, you say life is h-ll
but if you really knew what h-ll felt like you would k!ll yourself
see i’m the devil, and even i know what’s right to do
but it’s up to me to put a l-st for you inside of you
look at the way you live, so why conclude
you know me, and don’t you dare say that i’m confused
cause even i can see your life is a waste
you couldn’t walk in the shoes of the underprivileged or let alone look em right in the face

- john wesley rap

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