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i feel nothing
when i’m with you
except my pride eroding away
on the front porch of your mother’s
she said “stay away from my daughter”
i never meant to hurt you
with my indifference and apathy
but my heart just can’t take it
i just can’t stand to be happy

there are pictures of us at my mom’s house
bleached white from the sun
she says “oh i sure love this one
you look like you’re having so much fun!”
i screamed at her to take them down
she looked on the verge of crying
she says “oh i’m sorry baby
but they’re the only ones i have of you smiling!”

i want to blend in with the wallpaper
seep in through the floorboards
i don’t want to see you with another
i don’t want to seem too broken up

and when i see you at the mall
with your stroller and your perfect family
like always i’ll just play it cool
like always i’ll pretend to feel nothing

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