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letra de just how i feel, pt. 2 - hotel books

[intro]
“one day, confucius was out for a walk with his disciples. and he saw an old man fall into a big mountain stream. he thought, “alas, he is sick and old and tired of life and he’s making up with himself.” for below where the point he fell in was an enormous cataract, and then, uh, rocks and rapids underneath. but suddenly, the old man appeared way down below the rapids. he crawled out of the stream, and went strolling along the banks. confucius was amazed, and he immediately sent a disciple to run up to the old man so that he could talk to him. he said, “sir, i thought you were about to make away with yourself. but i see now that you must be a spirit.” and he said, “no, i’m not a spirit, i’m just a perfectly human being.” “well, then how did you survive the cataract?” he said, “in no special way. i just went in with a swirl and came up with a whirl. i, uh, did nothing, i simply adapted myself to the nature of the world.” and so in the same way, we have, uh, been connected with the daoist, and uhm, zen– earlier zen traditions. many instances of famous monks who were quite mad. on the announcement for the series of, uh, workshops and seminars, there is a drawing of uh, hanshan. and he and his companion shide, as the j-panese say, “kanzan and jittoku.” uh, they were two mountain hermits, who are favorite subjects of zen artists.”
(where our dreams come true)

[radio chatter]

[vocoder bridge]
this little light of mine
i’m gonna let it shine
this little light of mine
i’m gonna let it shine
even if it’s dark
i’m, i’m gonna let it shine
let it shine

[verse]
i will try not to acquiesce to the idealism i built in my head
consumed by an inaugural address in the corner of a concrete room with bittersweet lateral grooves
the remnants of this commencement dissipate through the trees and a forest leading to the fountain of life
where we’ll lose a fight when the continuum of life ceases
to simply comply with the energy we occupy
’cause when we’re alive it’s connected to our thoughts
which means the energy can be connected to our love or our hope
and when we finally choke, the energy will move on and our swan song will simply be an echo
so we can let go

[outro]
“hey john, this is a poem idea i have. i don’t know if i fleshed it out enough, i don’t know if i am saying more than i should without understanding it completely, but i want you to hear this. god is a camera and if you’re not ready to show up with your own camera, then you should be– you should not be in the scene. i wanna be something, but i don’t want to feel the weight of accepting responsibility. so i don’t drive down the roads where my dead friends used to live, i don’t drive by the house where my innocence died as a kid. i was supposed to be at the church of christ, not the church of vices, but now i’m afraid to love someone who isn’t like this. so i changed the radio station, where they played the new eminem featuring ed sheeran, ’cause i don’t need another white pop star collaboration to define my generation. forgive me, friends, i created this world in my head. i’m sorry you have to live with it. nah. scratch that. forgive me, friends, i’m selfish. i dunno, let me know if you’re interested, call me back buddy. bye.”

- hotel books

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