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letra de the process - heylasfas!

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i think i must’ve fell asleep
or maybe i’m still dreaming
it’s fine
i know now i’m awake
these four walls we’re surrounded by
don’t change these roots i’m sprouting
it’s fine
it’s not that i don’t like
the dry taste of formaldehyde
on my tongue
cantankerous
or cancerous
i’m here
but i can’t
tell the difference
between life and
death but i know
the transition’s art

i think i feel beside myself today
i must have missed our circumstance
or maybe i’m the outside looking in
a cry for help i could not push away
for a hundred concepts laid to rest
now to kindle these embers that burn
yet another piece of me (burn brighter)
don’t tell me you know
’cause i know people lie
it’s more fun on the ground than anyone admits

i might just still be in a haze
of pleasure or frustration
it’s fine
i’m used to this anyway
remembering this fever dream
where colors did not have names
it’s fine
then you showed up and
took me far away from here
it didn’t matter what we did
i’d still find inspiration
i’d still know information
i’d still know everything i was
but now i’m having trouble

one: i know my full name
two: i know how to dress myself
three: i know where i can use the restroom without anyone complaining about how long i take
four: i need a haircut

at least i’m sure about that last one

i think i feel beside myself today
you know i’m bad with circumstance
or maybe i’m the outside looking in
this reprisal comes without a delay
collapsing in a public sp-ce
and knowing that you might not be okay
losing marks for losing face (to ashes)
and you think you know
’cause i can’t help but cry
it’s more fun on the ground than anyone admits

i think i feel beside myself today
it’s lashing out at circumstance
you know i’m bad with circumstance
i lost myself in circumstance
i’m terrible with circumstance
and i’m still coming to terms that i might not know what being happy feels like

but i’m getting better
and you’re getting better too
so despite all of this mess i’m still glad against all odds we both made it out alive
(….. …)

i think i feel beside myself today
and moving past the circumstance
i might still be the outside looking in
but for the first time i might feel okay
i thought about it much too hard
and my head itches, so i’m still awake
and i’m glad you’re stuck with me
a feeling i can’t shake, everything’s alright
it’s more fun on the ground than anyone admits

it’s more fun on the ground than anyone admits

- heylasfas

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