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letra de sable park - ​elizabeth whitington

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i just want all of this to be over
never promised i’d stay 30 sober
somewhere where we don’t hate each other
and you can’t recognize my face
please, can we get out of this place?
i’m tugging at your sweater sleeve like a child
because i know that’s what gets you off
on my back, a map of the true and stable bite marks

it’s nice to see you
it’s nice to see you again
i returned your face
i had my fun and now we’re not friends
i cried every night like you cared if i were alive
jigsaw pieces cut into your flesh
there’s nothing more i can say that i didn’t spit into word vomit on the last lp
being self-referential doesn’t equal intelligent mystique
it’s a cop-out and a crutch to not say anything
i’d like all of you to think i’m a little bit more clever than i lead on
like i plan out every word i type before i hit record
and like i’m leaving little easter eggs and messages you’ll never get to see or be able to understand
like that line about patrick bateman and the robot
and plastic little sticker stars hung on top of your sister’s car
please don’t let me go
i have no limits to how you can use me
i don’t deserve the right to say no
fear is the binding agent to which all humans are tied to
and s-x is just a nightmare in a dream about jumping off a lean-to
another party by myself
and you’re sitting with everyone else
while i cut into my body for the brief chance that you smile

- elizabeth whitington

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