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letra de the love lost in river city - eli the guy

[intro]
the child is still in pain
do-do-do-dah-dah, ba-do-do, bah-ah, do-do, ba-da-ba-da-da (mmm, eli, look)

[verse]
lately can’t shake it, undermedicated, hate because it’s easiest (do-do-do)
speaking out of anger, all my lane, i’m in the median (dah-dah, ba-do-do)
defensive when i’m speaking, since a child, been disobedient (bah-ah)
always had spite, but had trouble when receiving it (do-do, ba-da-ba-da-da)
always had strife, pops told me not to bleed in it and keep it pushing (do-do-do-dah-dah)
watch closely while i bleed, come and peep the footage (ba-do-do)
watch closely while i bleed, it’s deeper than the recent pеace (bah-ah, do-do, ba-da-ba-da-da)
this is relief, thе years are holding on
pr-ne to loath and loss, closing off, couldn’t tell a soul (do-do-do-dah-dah)
i was only eight when trauma called, sharks was all inside the water, blame myself, it’s all on me (oh, do-o-o-o)
i was only a child, felt something was wrong with me (do-gon-do, went to-)
felt i had to be the toughest, overcompensating (do-do-do-dah-dah)
had to keep running, i could never have that conversation (ba-do-do)
lashing out at dumb sh-t, filled with anger, no justification (bah-ah)
had to be the toughest, all the product of that situation (ba-da-ba-da-da)
can’t break the walls, feel like they’re breaking me (do-do-do-dah-dah)
i was only eight, i can’t keep blaming me (ba-do-do)
never that easy though, these walls, years in the making, breaking free (bah-ah)
it feel impossible, these walls are part of me (ba-da-ba-da-da)
defense mechanisms is volatile, trauma crawling on me (do-do-do-dah-dah)
wasn’t strong enough to stop it though, trauma crawling on me (ba-do-do)
left me unrecognizable, left me inside the matrix with tribulations and trials (bah-ah)
distorted self-image, the blurry picture to file (ba-da-ba-da-da)
the smile is always a frown when your world upside down (do-do-do)
cause a ruckus, hiding behind the tears of a clown (dah-dah)
when i drown, i was only a child (oh, do-o-o-o)
inside these shark-infested waters, i got lost in the wild (do-gon-do, went to-)
mmm, river city
tell me what you’re looking for, what do you desire (oh-do-do-dah-dah)
rock designer just to look important, what you tryna hide (ba-do-do)
on my own i keep it pushing, tryna heal my inner child (bah-ah)
false grin crooked, try our best to wear its smile (ba-da-ba-da-da)
everybody been hurting, seen some sh-t they never talk about (do-do-do-dah-dah)
a cold as closed curtains, in these jordans, gonna walk them out (ba-do-do)
struggle being open, felt some sh-t i never talk about (bah-ah)
i was just a child, with innocence and a lost and found (ba-da-ba-da-da)
i was just a child when neighborhood tried to hawk him down (do-do-do-dah-dah)
ain’t n0body found him, unresolved, wish i could find him now (ba-do-do)
now a n-gga grown, try that sh-t again, i’m stronger now (bah-ah)
now that n-gga grown, try that sh-t again, i’m- uh (ba-da-ba-da-da)
now i’m twenty-two, through the years, the tears fall (do-do-do-dah-dah)
so many knuckles bruised from wishing you was the wall (ba-do-do)
so many petty scuffles at school, fights in the halls (bah-ah)
lashing out for all the times that i felt too small (ba-da-ba-da-da)
even still i’m insecure (do-do-do-dah-dah)
lashing out at homies, n-gga save your reassurance (ba-do-do)
i’m destined to be lonely, n-gga i was just a kid, and still a child because of it (bah-ah)
finally it’s time to stop running unconfident (ba-da-ba-da-da)
cause we all was only children with innocence in the lost and found (do-do-do-dah-dah)
we was only children when neighborhood tried to hawk him down (ba-do-do)
ain’t n0body found him, unresolved, wish we could find him now (bah-ah)
now we all grown, try that sh-t again, we stronger now (ba-da-ba-da-da)
mmm, mmm (do-do-do-dah-dah, ba-do-do)
i was just a child, with innocence and a lost and found (bah-ah)
i was just a child when neighborhood tried to hawk him down (ba-da-ba-da-da)
ain’t n0body found him, unresolved, wish i could find him now (oh-do-do-dah-dah)
now a n-gga grown, try that sh-t again, i’m stronger now (oh, do-o-o-o)
mmm, now a n-gga grown, try that sh-t again, i’m stronger now (do-gon-do, went to-)
[outro]
cause when you hit a certain age you start to reflect (do-do-do-dah-dah, ba-do-do)
you hit a certain age in life, man, you start to reflect (bah-ah)
and then you start looking back on all them things you thought mattered (ba-da-ba-da-da)
and you start yo realize none of it did (oh-do-do-dah-dah)
because the only thing that mattered was your personal happiness (oh, do-o-o-o, do-gon-do, went to-)
your sanity, your ability to deal
and the rest of this sh-t is just sh-t
it comes and goes
all of that f-cking sh-t comes and goes
the only things that mattered was your personal happiness

- eli the guy

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