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letra de thanks - dulin

(verse 1)
yo
think just because i’m an introvert
that i ain’t crying out well that sh-t’s absurd
think by now it’s time to admit the worst
they would love me more if i was in a he-rs-
they don’t know that i’m a different person
they don’t know that all my thoughts have worsened
if you’re looking for my rationale and reasoning
then find that sh-t up on the note in cursive
so please stop with the pleasantries
don’t tell me to call no 273
when i’m in death’s arms i’m forever free
it’s been weighing on my heart heavily
don’t tell me to look at the bible
don’t tell me to turn to the lord
because i tried that so many times
and he don’t care about the way i’m moving toward
okay
life for me is a treacherous journey
will be until i’m on a medical gurney
popping the xans and i’m swallowing perky’s
drowning in alcohol vision get blurry
and how much worse can the world get?
the pain i’m thinking i deserve it
and i’m about to go out like kurt did
cause ain’t n0body telling me i’m worth sh-t
don’t tell me to call no d-mn hotline
before i blow out my brains with a glock nine
i’ll be outlined in a chalk line
or hanging from a rope with a cut spine
preacher tell me suicide is a sin
so is drowning all my problems in gin
i ain’t even smiled since i don’t know when
subtly snipping and cutting my skin
wait, brakes, you’re making a mistake
blood can’t be warm in a world of snakes
all the people around me they observe the ache
i need love and they prefer to hate
i could be a post that you’re leaning on
when you’re around me you could be weak or strong
both of us when we’re out in public
got masks on like the remix song
can’t empathize you don’t know my pain
since 12 i’ve been wanting to blow my brain
and i’ve never been feeling as though i’m sane
don’t see sunshine i see snow and rain
i’ve been going through some sh-t too
my carpal tunnels they’ve been slit too
yeah
i’ve been wanting to quit too
when i emptied out the box of tissues

(verse 2)
check
uh
why, h-llo, i was in your place a while ago
took too much courage to dial the phone
it had been about 2 years
since a motherf-cking smile was shown
thought god had abandoned me
happiness was a fantasy
n0body cared not one friend
and not even anyone up in my family
i spent days crying, fake smiling
thought to myself, oh, great timing
thinking about it, same time
your boy started drinking and became violent
that very day, i ran away, out in my mind i began astray
all i had was xanax, percocet, an ounce of weed
and a phantom blade
my picture where the frame fits
tell me how close can the flame get
right here with a glock on my desk
don’t mean you’ve got to go through the same sh-t
robyn and mindy, sobbing and grinning
going through my head
100 motherf-cking thoughts in a minute
marilyn and cobain, heroin and cocaine
laying with a needle with the black tar in it
so i’ll tell you to call a d-mn hotline
before you blow out your brains with a glock nine
call the number and save your life
because lord knows that motherf-cker saved mine
i don’t wanna go visit your gravesite
so i take time to create rhymes on a baseline
because i heard that sh-t through the grapevine
that you ain’t fine
text my -ss when you need a friend
i don’t wanna see your blood up on the sheets again
see you on the other side of either end
upon me depend when you need defense
i remember floating up in dreamville
bottle empty need a refill
oh, and about them xans, f-ck it i lost a friend to the green pill
better not be off of the percocet
you’ve got me breaking out up in a nervous sweat
anyone thinking you ain’t the most perfect yet
clowns like them belong under a circus tent
i don’t ever wanna see you slit your wrists
because you’re different and they’re ignorant
but pause, what if i ain’t got resolve
i’ll be there with you problem solved

- dulin

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