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letra de i don't know how long i'll stay better - delikately

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mm
made the bed like you’d be back
folded your side out of habit
yeah
phone face-down
still charging overnight
like i’m waiting
but i’m not

i’m not better
but i’m trying
i swear i am, i swear i—

if you’re gonna come back
do it now
come back while i’m still like this
washed my hair
ate something
sort of

please
come back while i’m still like this
before i say something i can’t un-say
if you’re gonna love me
do it now
ah
bought oat milk
like maybe i’d start showing up for myself
you said i seemed lighter
yeah
i’ve been skipping dinner and conversations
it’s easier to disappear
than say i need room to fall apart without being asked to clean it up

i’m not better
but i’m trying
i swear i am, i swear i—

if you’re gonna come back
do it now
come back while i still believe you could
before i make a joke and ruin it

please
come back while i’m still like this
before i start drinking again
if you’re gonna love me
don’t wait for me to ask

okay, you want honesty?
i don’t know how long this version of me lasts
this “doing great”
this “sleeping through the night”
this “so glad we talked”
i’ve been good lately
like suspiciously good
like i’m stalling
like i know what’s coming
like i’m about to fall apart again

so if you’re coming back
now’s the time
come back while i still make sense
while i still remember
how to hold myself together
in front of you

before i remember how bad it got
before i go quiet again
before i rewrite it in my head
and swear i made the whole thing up

i don’t know how long i’ll stay better
so if you’re gonna love me
do it now

- delikately

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