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letra de drama club dropout - delikately

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oh
i quit today
didn’t announce it
just… stopped replying to the group chat
huh
told myself it was self-preservation
but really i just couldn’t stand
performing sincerity for free anymore

stand stage left
tilt chin
say the thing like you mean it
even if your throat feels like it’s closing

mm-hmm
drama club dropout
but the show goes on
even when no one’s watching
mm
they said i was a natural
naturally unraveling

huh
i didn’t forget my lines
i just don’t believe them anymore
oh
i learned how to take up sp-ce
without being seen
how to deliver a breakdown
at an appropriate volume
huh
they said i was “believable”
cool
i lied well

should’ve put that on the résumé
expert at becoming the girl you root for
right before she dies

mm-hmm
drama club dropout
but the drama won’t leave
still wait for the blackout
still brace for applause
ah
they said i was unforgettable
but no one called

huh
didn’t forget my lines
i just started choking on them
i said i didn’t care
i said i was over it
i said “it’s just high school theatre”
but i watched them do the table read without me and
i felt like my t–th were falling out
like i missed a funeral for someone who isn’t dead yet
which is maybe just my way of saying
i wanted them to be sad i left
but also i’d hate them if they were

oh-oh
drama club dropout
but the audience lingers
i still bow in dreams
still wait for applause
that doesn’t come
they said i was unforgettable
but no one’s called
guess i was only brilliant
when lit just right

i quit because i could
too well
like dangerously well
like, one day i’d forget i was pretending
and just disappear inside the role
of “girl who takes it all with a smile”

- delikately

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