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letra de dear trumpy (love letter to donald trump) - dan bull

[intro]
this is a love letter
to donald trump

[verse 1]
you’re a cold mack, donald
a role model
for the entrepreneurs
who don’t mind being called horrible
you’re better than donald rumsfeld
and donald duck
donald pleasance, glover, sterling
sutherland and ronald mc
if you weren’t rich
then you might well have been handcuffed
but instead of “guilty”
you can just cry “bankrupt”
give yourself a quarter billion salary
and build aeroplanes with gold plated lavatories
it’s only fair that you get fair pay
to keep the economy afloat by buying hairspray
yeah, cray
pile on the layers of spray tan
’til you have an excuse for being mistaken for satan

[chorus]
i wanna hump donald trump
put my thumbs on his rump
then pump
trump
for president
trump for president
vote donald j. trump
for president
whatever anyone cleverer says is irrelevant
just vote donald j. trump
for president

[verse 2]
you’re the landlord of the fellow that played john mcclane
now there’s a real hero
take note, john mccain
donald knows how to keep the oil price low:
find out what they’re asking for it
and just say “no”
see trump debunk the hoax of global warming
if it was true his walk-in freezer would be thawing
evidence is boring
whereas dogmatic thought isn’t
so vaccination is the blatant cause of autism
driving farmers out of their family homes with force
why? to build a f-cking luxury golf course
of course
it’s par for the course, some find it co-rs-
you can’t please everyone
ivana divorce
men and women can’t work together
segregate the military
everything’ll be better
’cause men are rapists, they can’t help this
and it’s a well known fact women are helpless
they’re too pretty to risk military service
thank trump for miss usa to give them purpose
they do it for the donald
for the donald
let’s do it for the donald
the donald, the donald

[verse 3]
you know how to make america great again
you’re used to being in debt
and then just starting a new slate again
file another chapter eleven
and to refill your wallet
sue a journalist for several billion dollars
other men in your shoes might choose to retire
but if any of your suggested that to you
then they’d be fired
bring back the death penalty
executioners are mlg
black lives don’t matter if i reckon they’re guilty
hey, that’s not a racial attack
like donald says
he’s got a great relationship with the blacks
and what he lacks in tact
he packs in stacks of cash
land grabs and manly pats on the back
donald trump can break a man
simply by shaking hands
donald trump can break a bank
simply by making plans
throw your bankrupt companies in the air
and pare that debt like you just don’t care

[chorus]
trump
for president
trump for president
vote donald j. trump
for president
whatever anyone cleverer says is irrelevant
just vote donald j. trump
for president

i wanna hump donald trump
put my thumbs on his rump
then..

[verse 4]
it’s the republican pundit
pummeling, punishing
not pulling punches, pumping up the public
and the publishers are loving it
you’re bringing fanatical fringe feeling to the forefront
with the fab fringe of a bl–dy liverpudlian
take a little sprinkle of rhetorical eloquence
that is as nebulous as that mess of follicle negligence
blend a bit of venom and pretend that you’re intelligent
and what do you get?
to be the next president
you impressed us and blessed us
with your excellence
so we request that you prevent a pestilence
of pesky mexicans
we need a reckless non son of an orangutan
to rescue america from ending up in excrement

[outro]
yours sincerely
dan bull

- dan bull

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