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letra de ottessa - crippling alcoholism

that cruel b-tch
in fishnets
owns all existence
she suicides by fire
although she never can die
oh no, she never can die
she is violence divine
and her will is pure greed
the blood of all things
she suicides by fire
although she never can die
oh no, she never can die
we are ideas
in her mind

i am sh-t
and i’ll always be sh-t
street rat baptized in west philly spit
a creaturе of sin
a wh0re wouldn’t kiss
even if she was sick
and thе cure was my lips

yeah i got my problems with law
and what about em?
warrants for my neck?
i’ll f-cking drown in em
you might think some words will keep you safe
but them men with guns
will just blow your ass away
yeah i got my problems with the law
and what about em?
water turning red
in county showers
you might leave this bleak facility
but them prison bars
stay with you
after you’re freed
cause that’s what trauma does
he outlives his victims
drinking their delicious blood
breathing white lies into black lungs
yeah that’s how trauma works
he watches from the dark
studying your every word
while whispering intrusive thoughts

i wanna be touched
like someone who’s loved
some intimacy
would have meant the world to me
i wanna be touched
an object of l-st
some intimacy
would have meant the world to me

if i wasn’t
born so ugly
would she covet?
would she want me?
would the loathing
wither away?
would the mirrors
sing of praise?
would her kiss pierce
through the skies?
and shower
me in light?
would i relish the feeling?
would it even be me?
and even after all that she’s done
i’m still in love
and heaven is as empty
as a junky’s stomach
but this world
for me
is enough

- crippling alcoholism

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