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letra de grow - cat sandison

when i was little, my nonna would bake
italian dolci, she taught me to make
panettone, panforte, the family recipes flowed
i loved maritozzi, my favorite of all
a sweet, creamy brioche rolled into a bowl
but this was a bun that demanded attention and time

i’d sit by the oven, engrossed in the dough
and nonna said, “darling, just watch it
grow, grow, grow”
bun in the oven
grow, grow, grow
bun in the oven, grow

italian family is big, like our food
and i always knew that i longed for a brood
so, when i met mike i said, “strap yourself in for a ride”
so we started to try, we tried for a year
then we went to the doctor and she made it clear
it wouldn’t be easy, but we were determined to try
so, out went the biscuits, the booze, and the bread
we signed up to yoga, ate kale on our head
and made love so often the neighbors, they had to complain

and then came the treatment, the nhs way
and i jabbed in my belly, like three times a day
with my legs in the air, mike would cradle me closely and say
“grow, grow, grow”
bun in the oven
grow, grow, grow
bun in the oven, we’re waiting for you to grow
but life as we know it, has other ideas
and one day a month, i’d be drowning in tears
so i picked up my pinny and found myself starting to bake
and it’s helped with the pain
knowing i had a bowl, an escape
as i rolled out those bowls to their childhood shape, i was calm

(grow, grow, grow) grow, grow, grow (grow, grow, grow)
i finally had some control
something that i could make grow
i used to belief that it’d grow
but now i’ve replaced it with dough

if nonna could see me, i’d want her to know
her recipes saved me
and taught me to grow

- cat sandison

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