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letra de nature nurture make her hurt her - callie flemming

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[verse 1]
there’s a place that i go
where n0body can find me
nothing to feel and nothing to see

but the glow of the bottle
held up to the light
and the sting of relapsing on a friday night

i should be on the town
with the rest of my friends
but i’m nursing my spite and my loathing again

everclear, my dear, oh
how i’ve missed you
there’s a voice in my ear
telling me it’s an issue, i know

how it goes

[chorus]
yes, i’m aware i made a mess
blowing out my sutures
enough about my alcoholic past
let’s discuss my alcoholic future
[verse 2]
it feels so normal, and that’s why i’m scared
was it you? was it me? what the f-ck! (who cares!)

i’ll save the dissection of all of my flaws
for the day that i step into therapy’s jaws

at the end of the day
i’ve got nothing to blame
but my selfish desire to feel okay

i know it’s unhealthy, but what can i do?
i’d rather not think than think about you

[chorus]
yes, i’m aware i made a mess
blowing out my sutures
enough about my alcoholic past
let’s discuss my alcoholic future

did i get it from my mother
or did i get it from my friends?
none of that will matter when i’m dead

[bridge]
i promised you the world
but all you got was me
just a stupid little girl
trying to sabotage her body
tonight i let me down
just like i always have
swear i’ll make these feelings drown
swear i’ll split this f-cking scab

it doesn’t really matter
how many sober years i broke
when you’re up there ogling at her
and all i can do is hope

i’m hurtling to my twenties
is it really a surprise?
take a good look at me, honey
am i having a good time?

[chorus]
little miss slack-jawed schism
for a while, we thought you really had it
i never struggled with alcoholism
in fact, i think i was pretty good at it

i don’t have a drinking problem
i’d call it a drinking solution
i feel fine when it’s over
i just f-ck up the execution
does it really matter how i got there
if they like me when i’m done?
there’s nothing wrong with having just a bit of college fun

- callie flemming

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