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letra de da turkey song - bananas at large

well i crawl outta bed, about quarter to 4
grabbed my turkey gun and stumbled out the door
i never get up before the crack of dawn
but i’ll be sitting at the roost before them first turkeys yawn

yes i will

if ya wanna get a turkey, you need a lot more than luck
you can’t just sit there like a
dumb cluck
it ain’t like huntin bucks, or waiting for a goose
you gotta sound s-xy and learn to seduce

turkeys kinda do it like this

so i grab my bag of tricks, scratch my head
time to get them turkeys moving
wake em up from the dеad
i reach for old faithful, my favorite call
gonna round me up a hеrd of them
b-tter b-lls
now you gotta hold still as still can be
there could be eye b-lls in the bushes, looking at me
oh it’s my nose
my b-tt began to hurt had mosquitos landing on the back of my shirt
now i made a little cackle
just as quiet as a mouse
that’s when that no-good corn-brained fowl-feathered p-ck-r-shoveler of a manure spreader
scared the cr-p right out of me
you know what a turkey is don’t ya?
it’s a b-52 grouse!
felt like someone pulled the ol honey wagon right through my shorts

he flipped me the bird as he made his retreat
i had one thing on my mind
lunch meat
then off in the distance pretty early morning calm
came the sound of pounding drumsticks on
tom-toms

hear em?

i seen em all coming sent my heart in fibrillation
i was sitting in the middle
of the whole turkey nation
got my ammo, my camo and my tommy gun
down set and ready for the key key run

well they came from the bushes
they came from the trees
and the leader of the pack looked like
turkules
scratchin in the hay
and doing his strut
he was big as a tractor going putt-putt-putt
i got you now ol blackbeard!

i had a gravy shot at his cranberry head
gonna mash that turkey and stuff him with lead
he was already cooking for the thanksgiving feast
when i raised the old p-ck-rwrecker, to blast that beast

goshdarned taiwan shotgun! cheap terrorist ammo!

the hills were full of rednecks comin like a streak
every tom, jake and hen was foaming at the beak
they were flappin
and cr-ppin
and clawing at my back
oh my god, it’s a turkey attack!

come here, fatboy!

i was runnin, and yellin’ at the top of my voice
felt like a hatfield, fighting off the mccoys!
it was just my luck, out of the fog
came that no-mean-good ornery neighbors, farm dog!

with the turkeys on my tail, and the hound coming fast
i stuck my muzzle in the mud, and landed on my axe
doop over teakettle, i thought i was doomed
then all of a sudden (gunshot)
c’mere you little gobbler
i’m gonna wring your neck
wait til i get my hands on your gizard

can you believe this guy?
what he won’t do for a turkey sandwich!

- bananas at large

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