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letra de i'm turning into my grandma - b.a.johnston

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i am old and pasty and angry
getting more and more crabby
in every way

i don’t understand what’s happening today
my joints ache and my back hurts
and soon i will be pushing up dirt
and a thought occurs to me

i am turning into my grandma
i am turning into my grandma
slowly but surely in every way
i am turning into my grandma

i don’t listen to iron maiden no more
the heavy metal records just lie on the floor
they gather dust, they are unplayed

i’m too busy listening to an am signal
got big bands on my radio
between commercials for funeral homes

i am turning into my grandma
i am turning into my grandma
slowly but surely in every way
i am turning into my grandma

my grandma would rant
my grandma would rave
about the j-panese and about the g-ys
and about her love of michael bublé

now i am old and brain-confused
but there’s a few things that i do not do
racism, h-m-phobia and michael bublé

i am turning into my grandma
i am turning into my grandma
slowly but surely in almost every way
i am turning into my grandma

he’s turning into his grandma
he’s turning into his grandma
slowly but surely in every way
he’s turning into his grandma

“personally, i like to lay into a kid with a melon baller
it’s got a nice weight, good balance in the hand. and it’s portable.”

- b a johnston

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